You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize