too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
