who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
