Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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