2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
