she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
bring money and cleavage
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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