you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
