so that wasnt chicken after all
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
