Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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