we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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