I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
