By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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