I am puke
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
