I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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