I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
