so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
