Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
