I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
