All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
