yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I understand Curling. That high.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
