Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
