just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
