I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
