It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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