Sorry, I don't speak sober.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
