I have demons in me.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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