she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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