New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
