Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
operation harelip BJ is a go
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
