Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
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