I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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