hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
