Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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