I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
