I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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