Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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