Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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