So drunk its hurt
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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