Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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