We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
