She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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