Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
