Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize