He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
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