everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
