evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize