Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize