Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
