I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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