I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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