better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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