I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
She even gives head with a lisp.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
