if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
